Words to inspire Alphabet Advent Calendar 0612

Day 6

F is for Freedom
When considering yesterday’s word enjoy, I also discovered that we may need to have a sense of freedom in order to fully enjoy life. For there to be a need for freedom, there first has to be a state of captivity. As I explored this I identified lots of things that could cause us to be bound. It doesn’t just mean being locked up physically but we can be captive in the mind. Our past journey could make us bound.
We may have been conditioned to believe we will not become the things we believed we could be or be able to do the things we desired, so without even trying we just don’t. We might have been told by a bully or a parent that we are useless or unattractive so we live life in that captive state not even trying and actually getting annoyed when people tell us we are beautiful. Or we may have come from a family whereby everyone is a doctor but we wanted to be a dancer. We believed that our family wouldn’t accept that path so we studied medicine and we run our own surgery when we really want to run a dance school.
We may have been abused physically, mentally or emotionally and because of the things that happened to us, we find it hard to do certain things or go to certain places. Those past hurts continue to restrict us.

We can actually make ourselves bound too. Our journey so far may have caused us heartache when dealing with people so we decide we’ve had enough of being hurt by them and decide not to get close to anyone again. We don’t go into the staff room and make friends and we keep ourselves to ourselves.

We may have been conditioned to believe we shouldn’t hang around with a certain type of person or someone from another ethnicity or background because they won’t understand us. Therefore, we’ve subconsciously only befriended people we believe have something in common with us and as a result our circle is limited to the same old, same old.

Freedom is an important word for me. By understanding my past captivity and learning how to break free has completely transformed my world and my thinking. I named my concept album “Break free” because the moment I broke away from things that caused captivity was the moment I began to enjoy being the real me. Free to do whatever and go wherever.

I didn’t realise how deep rooted some of my issues were until I really explored them. Some things of my past created chains around me neck and restricted my enjoyment of life. I made some really bad choices because I was fighting against the captivity rather than breaking free from it.

Some of my issues made me very controlling. I felt I needed to make sure no one ever made me feel helpless again. I subconsciously thought by controlling those around me and my situations that would prevent it from happening again. However, this need for control caused me to do things that hurt or had the potential to hurt people around me. I was actually quite reckless but also disguised it so well. I also tried to sabotage anything that was great or had potential because I didn’t believe I deserved greatness.

Fear was a massive thing for me. It actually choked me sometimes. I had the fear that things will go wrong so I wouldn’t attempt it. I had fear that things would go right but I’m likely to mess it up so wouldn’t go near it. Fear no longer has a hold over me!

Thankfully the Almighty saw everything and saw my train going off the rails so had to send in the heavies to put me straight again.
Someone dear to me was given insight into what was happening and actually made me shake it off and break the cycle. The moment I broke the cycle and changed certain patterns in my life was my moment of freedom. I detached myself from so much negativity of the mind which also meant detaching from situations and people that were associated with that old destructive path.
When I discovered freedom, I discovered that I didn’t have to please anyone but God above and the little family he had blessed me with. I began to acknowledge that all things were possible and barriers can be pulled down. Being free has helped me not to accept things I don’t think are helpful for my journey. My No is now NO! No one can twist my hand to do things I don’t want to do. I have extended that to my children too. If I don’t think they should be doing something I don’t just go along with it because everyone else does. Just because that’s the way it has been done before, doesn’t mean it can’t be changed for us. I am free to give my opinion and suggest other ways of doing things that may work better.

When I was bound I didn’t think enjoyment was something for me but now I’m free, I’m free to do anything including having fun. My late mother left me some beautiful pieces of cloth which I couldn’t go near before, but since finding freedom, I understand that I am free to wear anything so wearing her cloth is no longer painful. I broke free of the pain that entangled me.

Sometimes finding freedom is a long process, we have to keep being free. But first we need to explore which situations or belief systems are causing captivity in our lives. Is there anything in your life that is restricting you? Are there things that no longer belong but still want to reside with you? Are you holding onto the key that could set you free because you don’t think you deserve it? Do you need to shake off particular mindsets so you can be open to new experiences?
Today I encourage you to explore yourself and if you find anything that is keeping you bound, please, please, please find ways to break free from it. It might not happen over night but taking the first step is important. I have to keep being free and keep reminding myself that certain things no longer have a hold over me. I can’t let anything spoil my enjoyment and living life to the full.
Discover freedom, break free and enjoy!

Peace and love

MrsJK