Words to inspire 041116

Words to inspire:

I spoke about being ‘too modest’ yesterday and actually in my opinion this is a real issue in the country I live in. I do not think we are good at speaking highly of ourselves until we have to sell ourselves during a job interview. I think it’s because we don’t want to come across arrogant. We lift others up quite easily but we do not lift up ourselves as well.

When we reflect on the past do we count the blessings in our lives and look at how far we have come and say to ourselves ‘well done’? Or do we just look back at what we haven’t done and the negative stuff that’s has occurred and wait for others to remind us how remarkable we are?

One of my dear friends and sister encouraged me to start praising myself more. That felt a bit uncomfortable at first but she made me realise, as I celebrate myself I am also celebrating the one who gave all the things to me and made me this way.

I suffered from lack of confidence and low self esteem for many years and in order to try to recover from that, I think I waited for others to validate me and reassure me that I was doing well. Why? No idea! I finally realised that I needed to start with myself like MJ sang “I’m starting with the man in the mirror.” We can’t wait for others to help lift us up. It might not ever happen because people do not live our lives so they won’t truly know what we have faced and maybe still facing.

I have shared snippets of my journey with others but actually no human on this earth apart from me, knows the half of it. My husband and my dear sisters from another mother know a lot but they don’t know every detail about every day that I have lived on this earth so far. There’s too much to recall.

Sometimes, I trivialise what I have conquered, but when considering it properly, it’s massive. How I’m still standing and how I am the way I am now is only by the grace of God. Unless I tell the tale, people won’t know that, so it will take me to give thanks and praise and congratulate myself for surviving certain things and finally making better choices.

Lots of us might not think there is anything to celebrate but I would argue with you on that. You may be raising children with a partner or on your own and you are still standing, that is to be celebrated. You have a roof over your head and you are not being evicted or having your house repossessed. Celebrate! You have conquered addictions and it doesn’t have to be the big ones that initially come to mind. It could be the fact that you gave up smoking or reduced it. It could be that you’ve started to eat cleaner and exercise. Celebrate! You have completed a school exam and your brain is still functioning as it was. Celebrate! You are able to ensure you have running tap water in your home. Celebrate! You have breath and you made it through another week. Celebrate!

Try to count your blessings and name them one by one. There are many people in the world that would love to have just a little taste of your life even if you don’t think there’s anything great about it.

There’s a self esteem and confidence building activity that I make my children do often. Together we find a recent photo of them, even if it’s one I took when they weren’t looking. We print it out and place it in the middle of a large piece of paper, usually A3. They then have to write positive things about themselves all around the photo or they tell me those things and I write it. I make them look in the mirror and talk to it too. Some days it’s really hard for them to do, but I encourage them to carry on. They need to understand that they are great which will help them stand up to potential bullying. The world isn’t always kind to us so we need to be kind to ourselves. I celebrate them often but I don’t want them to rely solely on us as parents to lift them up either. We might not be around for ever. I found that out when I lost my mum at a young age.

Part of enjoying life is about enjoying the successes of who we are. It doesn’t have to be anything groundbreaking. Not everyone has a purpose to help change the world. Our mere existence is something to celebrate. There is no one like us on this earth so if we weren’t on it, the world would be a different place.

So when you reflect please remember to count your blessings and celebrate you!

Peace and love

MrsJK